Lessons from Survivor Remorse ‘The Photo Shoot Episode”

This episode made me smile because it brought to life a story that I personally struggle with. I often have debates with others about colorism in our society and even in the black community.  The episode allowed me to step outside of myself and look at my actions through Missy. It also allowed me to see my faults in Reggie. While he didn’t have a problem with Missy’s photo-shoot vision, he hated her process in making that vision come to life.

Missy stepped in as Cam’s Public Relations representative.  Cam was given a major photoshoot and Missy wanted to use this as an opportunity to change not only Cam’s narrative but also the narrative of darker skin black girls.  She picked a beautiful brown-skin girl but when she was dropped at the last minute, the casting agent sent a fair skin model in her place. Having a dentist appointment, Missy was late to the shoot and didn’t discover until the middle of the photo shoot that a light-skin woman was replaced by her dark skin lead. To say that she lost it is mildly put.

While I was laughing and screaming “YAS Missy,” I didn’t realize that there was another side to this story.  I didn’t realize that while she was waving her flag for little dark girls everywhere she was also tearing someone else’s flag down. In that moment I recognized that closed-mindlessness in myself. I realized that sometimes we could get so caught up in pushing our own agendas that we hurt others in the process. (I really hope next season this issue come back up).

How many times have we turned a small disagreement into a huge fight? All because we tried to make sure our side heard? The old saying is true: prick your battles.  Weigh the pros and cons in every situation and remember that for every action there’s a consequence. In the words of Kevin Hart, “Always Play Chess not Checkers.” You can sacrifice the small wins for long term goals. Sometimes, it’s really not worth it and that applies to all aspects of life.